With Rockstar Games releasing the new L.A. Noire: Nicholson Electroplating Disaster DLC this past week, Planet Xbox 360 felt that it was a good time for L.A. Noire players to undergo some serious introspection. Have you been playing too much L.A. Noire? Maybe you carry around your own little notebook, or over-examine every day objects by rotating them right and left. If you made your daughter cry on Father’s Day after examining her card and proclaiming that it was “irrelevant to the case,” then it is time to seek help. Here are the top ten signs that you have been playing too much L.A. Noire.
10. You keep your own casebook, complete with suspect drawings, clues, and locations. I’m still trying to solve The Case of the Left Up Toilet Seat. Don’t worry, honey. I promise that I will bring that bastard to justice soon…..
9. When lying to your friends or coworkers, you suspiciously blink multiple times or look away from their faces. “No, I do not know who took your microwave burrito out of the fridge. Stop accusing me, Carl” (looks suspiciously down at the ground while talking and blinks multiple times).
8. Your furniture warehouse is ruined after the ice blocks containing your stolen morphine melt. I was out of boxes, so sue me!
7. When resisting arrest, you attempt to coerce the pursuing cop into a fist fight. This particular choice of action may land you on The World’s Dumbest Criminals, but at least you will go out swingin’. For added fun, be sure to duck behind a wall and clothesline the pursuing cop just as he/she goes around the corner.
6. You help your friend get out of his marriage by faking his death in an auto accident, covering the interior of the damaged vehicle with pig’s blood. I knew that pig blood was good for more than staging Carrie reenactments in my back yard, which I would never do because that would be weird (glances obviously at the floor).
This feature top 10 list concludes on the next page, please click Page 2 below to see our final signs that you played too much L.A. Noire.
