Whether or not to buy a movie-based game usually requires a second or two of thought, followed by an immediate 'no'. Sure, you love the film, but how can they possibly bring the same feel of the movie to your console? In most cases, the theme material does not quite lend itself to a videogame. Then, there is Pirates Of The Caribbean. If ever a film seemed ripe for a fantastic videogame adaptation, the Disney high seas adventure flicks seem to be it. Somehow, someone forgot to tell the developers.
The movie franchise was hugely successful for two reasons: Chicks dig Johnny Depp and the action-packed scenes were exciting. The developers got one-half right, but it is the part of the equation gamers could care less about. The game nails Depp's Captain Jack Sparrow character, along with most other characters from the film. The character models look good, most noticeably in the cut-scenes, although they overdid Sparrow's drunkenness to the point he appears in most scenes like a weeble-wobble about to tip over. The game gets the actors' looks and voice acting down correctly, with Depp and Orlando Bloom lending vocal talents to the game. In many ways, the game gets the tone and humor of the films correct. Unfortunately, they forgot that movie's most charming feature, as far as most viewers were concerned, was the action.
The films provided viewers with a glimpse at the lifestyle of the rockstars of their time, globetrotting pirates. As exciting as it looks on screen, and in nearly every other game featuring sword fighting, this version of sword battles feels stuck in quicksand. The battles all feel methodical and sluggish. Fighting off swarms of enemies should be fast, enthralling, and dangerous. Instead, gamers will feel like falling on their sword and ending it all. Though the game offers quite a few large, overwhelming battle scenarios against large mobs of enemies, each politely take their turn at you. This reeks of poor A.I. and lazy programming. Taking on one enemy at a time in a mob really deflates the excitement and anticipation of battle, leaving gamers lazily mashing buttons in the hopes that they are all finally dead so they can move on.
In addition, the larger battles rarely require you to fight off more than a few baddies before moving on to the next objective. Most large groups of enemies have a 'mob leader' you can only kill with a 'finishing move'. These are the most dangerous, and frustrating, enemies in the game, as attempting to fight them in normal slashing manner will result in you ending up on your butt, with less life for your trouble. Gamers must build up their finishing move meter by taking out regular enemies before engaging the 'leader' with an oddly effective finishing move, regardless of whether or not they have previously done any damage to them. Despite the lack of blood, the game's the finishing moves are surprisingly brutal, yet lethargic. Jack seems to move in slow motion, slicing through an enemy's stomach, slamming him to the ground, and finally plunging the sword into the enemy's chest.
The game occasionally offers the opportunity to fight with other members of their ship, such as Will. The d-pad smartly allows gamers to shift from one character to the next, but you will have to look closely to notice any difference. Each character fights identically, with only the characters looking slightly different. This lazy bit of programming offers no incentive to jump from one character to the next, leaving you playing with Sparrow most of the game unless one of the other characters is about to die. More frustrating is the way the items you come across do not carry over to the characters you are not using. Jack has a special attack system called "Jackism" activated by picking up shrunken heads from treasure chests. If you have Will selected and come across one, he cannot pick it up for Jack. Likewise, if Will is low on health and Jack is fully healed and comes across a health item, the game will leave it unused on the ground.
